Working Caregivers: The Invisible Employees

What Every Working Caregiver Needs to Know About Home Care

• Selma Archer & Zack Demopoulos • Season 1 • Episode 33

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In this episode, we sit down with longtime industry expert and caregiver Scott Greenberg for one of the most honest conversations we’ve had about what caregiving really looks like—especially while working. Scott brings decades of experience in home care, but more importantly, he shares what changed when he unexpectedly became a family caregiver himself. This is a grounded, real-world discussion about independence, denial, emotional toll, and the realities families face when care needs show up fast.
 We talk openly about affordability, long-distance caregiving, sibling dynamics, and why being proactive—not reactive—can make all the difference. Whether you’re a working caregiver, an employer, or someone who knows this journey is coming, this episode is packed with insight, hard truths, and practical guidance you don’t want to miss.

Scott Greenberg is CEO of ComForcare Senior Services, a private-duty, non-medical home healthcare agency serving Miami through Vero Beach. He is Past President of the Florida State Guardianship Association and former Treasurer of the National Guardianship Association, and serves on the Board of Directors for the Area Agency on Aging. Scott is an award-winning author of Oh My God, I’m Getting Older and So Is My Mom, former host of the 95.9FM True Oldies radio show of the same name, and a nationally certified Alzheimer’s educator since 2014.

 

Episode Highlights:

[0:00] – Why accepting help is not losing independence—but restoring it
 [1:15] – Introducing working caregivers as “invisible employees”
 [4:30] – Scott shares his personal caregiving journey and unexpected challenges
 [6:55] – The emotional toll of caregiving no one prepares you for
 [8:00] – Running a business while caregiving: compartmentalizing and perspective
 [10:30] – Family dynamics, denial, and hard lessons from past caregiving decisions
 [13:50] – How Scott landed in home care—and why the work became personal
 [16:00] – Writing a book to help families move from crisis to preparation
 [19:30] – Why caregiving youth and childhood trauma deserve more attention
 [21:00] – Home care myths, resistance to help, and how attitudes shift over time
 [24:15] – The most important questions families should ask home care agencies
 [26:45] – Planning ahead: advanced directives, decision-makers, and hard conversations
 [31:35] – Long-distance caregiving and why “the village” matters
 [34:55] – What employers can do to better support working caregivers
 [37:45] – The role (and limits) of AI and technology in caregiving
 [40:20] – Affordability, Medicare vs. Medicaid, and planning for long-term care
 [44:00] – Final takeaways: proactivity, education, and realistic expectations

 

Links & Resources:

 

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Scott Greenberg:

Let's face it, the generation who needs our services is the generation that says, I don't want any help. I don't need any help. Leave me alone. I can do it myself. Then they migrate into if you make me do this, I'll do it, but I won't make anybody happy. I'm going to do everything I can to sabotage this. But once they get help, they realize, hey, this isn't so bad after all. And then ultimately, it turns into, how did I ever live without this? But here's the thing that must be expressed to the person in need who is in denial and does not want help. Getting help is not the end of your independence. Get help is the beginning of the restoration of your independence. Did you know that in 2020 there were 53 million caregivers in the United States, and by 2025, this number is expected to grow to 62, point 5,000,073%

Jodi Krangle:

of these caregivers also have a job. They are called Working caregivers, and they are invisible because they don't talk about their caregiving challenges. Working caregivers. The Invisible employees is a podcast that will show you how to support working caregivers. Join Selma Archer and Zach demopoulos on the working caregivers the invisible employees podcast as they show you how to support working caregivers.

Zack Demopoulos:

Good morning, good afternoon, good evening. This is Zach demopoulos, host of working caregivers, the invisible employees. Thank you for checking in from wherever and whenever you are.

Selma Archer:

Thank you for being here. And I'm Selma Archer. Thank you for being here.

Zack Demopoulos:

Hey, Selma, how are you doing? I'm great. How are you doing, Zach? I'm doing fantastic. Doing fantastic. Came off the holidays. We're in the New Year mode. I have an old friend on the podcast today, and I can't wait to get into it. How were your holidays? Everything good.

Selma Archer:

All good. Ready for a new year of caregiving.

Zack Demopoulos:

Awesome, awesome. I want to welcome Scott Greenberg to the show. Hey Scott, how are you?

Scott Greenberg:

Man, I'm great. Zach, good to see you again. And Selma, nice to meet you.

Zack Demopoulos:

Nice to meet you, Scott. We appreciate you being here, my friend, not only you know, do you and I have 13, I have 13 years of home care background where I first met Scott, but we just, we constantly talk and and he's just a wealth of information. We're going to get into a lot of, a lot of his experiences and stories. But before we get started, Scott, would you at least give an idea to our listeners as to where you're calling in from, and tell me, tell us something interesting about where you live that maybe most people don't know.

Scott Greenberg:

So we're in Palm Beach Gardens, which is one of the fastest growing cities in the state of Florida at the moment, but the one thing that most people don't appreciate is that we are, by statute, required to have 51% of any building devoted to open area, common area, green space. So while our building is expanding significantly and dramatically and our population is growing, we have to devote an equal amount of land to open space for the enjoyment of all so it's pretty interesting. So we have a really nice spot.

Zack Demopoulos:

I did not know that that's, that's, that's pretty good. When did that go into effect?

Scott Greenberg:

I don't know, but I was hosting a breakfast for somebody who was running for town council. Former Mayor was running to be elected again, to be Town Council. She had to step off because of term limits, and it came up during the breakfast yesterday. So that's a new fact that I just learned. But I think it's in, it's it's in whatever governs our city requires that 51% be devoted to open green space. It's really, it's beautiful we have a lot of people love that, even though growing like crazy.

Zack Demopoulos:

I love that. And all three of us have either lived in New Jersey or I currently do live in New Jersey. New Jersey is actually well known for that. Most people don't think of New Jersey as doing that, and that is one area, one thing, why I really love living where I do but I'm glad to hear that. Wow, that's good news for Florida. Let's chalk one up for Florida. I'm glad to hear that. So let's get into why we have you here today. And again, you've got tremendous amount of experience as a caregiver, helping caregivers, writing a book about it, doing a show on it. We'll get into all that. But first of all, if you don't mind, can you tell us a little bit about your own caregiver experience? I understand that you're currently a caregiver as we speak.

Scott Greenberg:

So I've talked about family caregiving, did a radio show, wrote a book, I did all the things that you mentioned and never run. Really expecting to be family caregiver myself, but over the last couple of years, my wife has had a few health challenges. She was diagnosed with Parkinson's disease. She was diagnosed with normal pressure hydrocephalus. She's had, I think, nine surgeries in the last four or five years, two in the last 12 months, and so. I have become a family caregiver, and so it brings a whole new reality to the journey, and one that one is unprepared for. As prepared as I can be, and I doubt anyone could be more prepared than I was. I've still it's the cobbler without their shoes until it happens to you you don't really appreciate it so it's it's been quite the journey, a learning experience. I wish a better home.

Zack Demopoulos:

You actually took the words out of my mouth. I was gonna say, You got to be pretty good as a caregiver, but I bet you you've been caught with some surprises, right? What would be one?

Scott Greenberg:

So I think navigating the day to day trials of being a caregiver something that I have no problem doing what really has been the surprise is the emotional toll it takes, because you run the gamut from wanting to be all things to your the person you're caring for, to being resentful of the now new obligations that are on your table. So, you know, little things, you know, I mean, I had to learn to do the laundry. I had to learn to do empty the dishwasher. You know, things that sound mundane, but look, everybody has roles in relationships, and that was always my wife's role. Now I'm doing some of the things that I never did before, going to the supermarket with her, but or by myself, all of the kind of things that used to be handled solely by her are now either joint efforts or my effort. And so there's an emotional toll on in that reality that I was truly unprepared for. And it's not that I was totally unprepared. I run support groups. I mean, I know what it's like. I've talked to a lot of caregivers. Yeah, right, yeah. But it's easy. It's easy to preach, right? It's hard to be the recipient. So that's that's been an adjustment, I won't lie, it has been an adjustment. So so

Zack Demopoulos:

appreciate your honesty. Scott, also just a follow up question, you run a big business. How has that impacted? You know, having to run your business, do your job, and also caring for your dear wife.

Scott Greenberg:

So I think if you want something done, you give it to a busy person. I mean, I come out of a business background. You both come out of a business background. You know, we compartmentalize reasonably well, and I am able to do that. My wife is still working. It's a challenge, but she is still working. But thanks to technology, where I can work remotely more often than I could have perhaps 25 years ago, I work all the time that I was in Minnesota, where she went for treatment, ultimately went for treatment. So you know, I'm always connected. That hasn't been difficult. And I try not to let one crisis invade, if I can so and I try to keep everything in perspective, you know, fortunately, I'm old enough that I have some perspective, yeah, yeah.

Zack Demopoulos:

And just one more thing, you know, and we'll get to your book. But in your book, you did talk about how Irene, your wife, you know, was worried about her mom, Diana, I believe it is. And you really shared an important, honest experience. I got to just share it, you know, you said that you feel like you might have been partly the reason why she might have passed away prematurely, because of that conversation that maybe you could have had that you didn't. I don't want to put words in your mouth, but can you kind of walk us through that? What did you really mean by that experience? I would

Scott Greenberg:

frame that a little differently in terms of the intent of what I meant, what I think that my mother in law would have lived longer if I was able to have convinced her to do the things that she could have and maybe should have done to enhance the quality of her life. She was a widow. My father in law died. He was 80. They were about the same age, so a few years down the road, we tried desperately to get her to come down to Florida to go into an independent or assisted living. She insisted on saying independent. Of course, independent meant she sat in front of the TV and did crossword puzzles all day long and never really went anywhere, until she went somewhere, fell and broke her hip and then decided she didn't want to live anymore. So, you know, I had a conversation with her that said, you know, you got to keep up their exercise. You got to do your physical therapy. You got to do all what the doctor is telling you to do. And her answer was, yeah, no, I'm done. And so she just decided that she had had enough, and two weeks later, we buried her. So I don't know that I could have done any different, except I wish I knew then what I know now, where I might have been able to have a more intelligent conversation about how living in an independent and assisted living community. Because look, those of us who have been here in this space understand when you say, go to independent living, it's I'm not going to a nursing home. So everybody has this vision of a nursing home. One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, and of course. Some of these nursing homes are pretty damn nice. I wish I could go to some home, and probably, probably will one day, but the point is that I let her manage or navigate the narrative, and I don't think I was equipped, or we were equipped sufficiently to give her all the options and to explain what those options were in a way that might have got her to make different decisions. And it didn't help that, you know, because she's my mother in law, my brother in law, my wife's brother, was really no help either. Which, you know, that's a family dynamics thing we

Zack Demopoulos:

can relate to, that we can sell them, and I can relate to that as long distance caregivers and sibling issues.

Selma Archer:

Yep. Oh, yeah. So Scott, if we can just step back for a moment, you've been in a home care business for a number of years. How did you land there, and why do you do this work?

Scott Greenberg:

Was a moment of drunken stupor, Selma, it was never by design. This was purely accidental. I had retired from a previous life. I was 58 I was too young. I thought I could afford to retire. It was 2008 it was 2008 what I thought I had in 2009 what didn't exist anymore. So by 2010 I had taken two years off, and I knew I needed to do something, and through a series of events, I won't belabor the point I ended up in the home care business. I'd like to tell you, it was a passion, it was a direction. It wasn't I'm an unabashed capitalist. I thought it was a great place. Taking care of seniors in Florida is not a rocket science idea, and I thought it would be, you know, a good business opportunity. What I didn't realize is, I have 700 competitors in my primary County, and it's a very competitive industry. Nobody was waiting for Scott Greenberg to show up and put a shingle out. So there was a process. It's been a been very good journey today, it's a family business. I have two daughters in the business, son in law in the business, my wife's in the business. So it has become a real family effort we have over time, which, again, was not the reason I entered this industry. For we have learned through experience that the way we treat treat seniors in our country is really disgraceful. It just is. We just don't have a plan to take care of the elderly in in our country. I think, you know, it has become an incredible passion for us to give people the opportunity to live their best lives possible. And so we've been devoted and dedicated to that. And I think it translates into the success that we've had. I think a lot of people go in here because it looks like it's an easy way to make a living, but it has turned into something really passionate. So for example, we do 14 support groups a month for Alzheimer's and dementia families. We do eight or nine support groups for Parkinson's disease families. We do an incredible amount of public speaking. We don't charge for any of those things. I mean, we just that's giving back family. Today, I'm the chairman of the Area Agency on Aging here in Palm Beach County. So we, we have been dedicated and devoted to giving people the tools that they can to to live the best quality life possible. You know, when we talk about Alzheimer's, for example, we say people aren't dying with Alzheimer's, they're living with it. And that's kind of our mantra. So we tried to give both families and the person struggling as much help as they possibly can, and it's translated into a pretty good business, which is the part of the reason I got in the first place.

Zack Demopoulos:

That was that capitalist part, right?

Selma Archer:

Well, you also authored the book. Oh, my God, I'm getting older, and so is my mom, which sounds like a revelation. The title sounds like a revelation. I just wonder, why did you write the book? Was there anything that motivated you to want to write this book?

Scott Greenberg:

So I was doing the radio show by the same title, which was also kind of a moment of drunken stupor evolution, and one of the listeners to the show. Was listening to a show that we happen to be doing on strokes, and she had a special interest in strokes. She didn't have a radio in the house. She was driving home. She got home, she sat in her garage, got during commercial, went and got a drink, listening to the show in her car. She called me the next morning, she said, Did you ever think of doing a book? And I said, I had, but not about this anyway, she had been a loyal listener to the show. You know, again, from a marketing point of view, I'm again on the bash capitalist side of Scott Greenberg. You know what she said is, when you hand somebody a business card or a peddler, when you hand them a book, you're an expert. But I really felt that. I had something to say, and I needed to tell people who were willing to listen that you know you can be a victim or you can be a perpetrator, all right, and the system inflicts on many of us decisions that if you were proactive, you wouldn't likely have ever made. I had a lot more to say in the book, but I limited it because space being what space is, and I picked the subject matter that I felt was most important. And I'm pretty proud of it. It won a very prestigious independent Book Award, which was great. I can't tell you how many times people have called me and said, reading my book has helped to change their lives. And invariably, somebody will pick it up, read it, call me and say, because of you, I did x. And so I feel really good about that. I think the book has turned out to be monumentally effective in accomplishing what I set out to accomplish

Selma Archer:

in terms of your radio show. In the final show that I watched, you talk about the experts that you had as guests, the celebrities, just wondering, is there anyone in particular, any show in particular, that stands out for you?

Scott Greenberg:

I knew you were going to ask that and and because people asked all the time, I've been in 76 countries around the world. I've traveled all over the world. People say, What's your favorite? It's hard to say what my favorite guest was, because I was I was blessed one. It was my radio show. So I didn't talk to people I didn't want to talk to, and I didn't talk about things I didn't want to talk about. So I didn't let anybody come on my show who was trying to sell something, because I was not going to do that. So I tried to limit my guests to experts in the discipline that we were talking about. So Selma, I have, you know, I did 510 or 20 shows somewhere in there. I probably had 50 that would qualify as my favorite because some of the stuff was so important. One moment that stands out is I did a show about childhood trauma, which is an unusual subject matter for the purpose of the show. But again, it goes to the fact that, oh my god, I'm getting older. So as my mom was about people in the sandwich generation taking care of their mom, taking kids, taking care of their grandkids. It was there, and we're talking about childhood drama. And there was a guy who came on who asked us to be called. It was a calling show, and he asked about a question about dementia, which we weren't talking about at all. But then he said, I have to tell you, he said, and he was very emotional about it. He said, I wish I had heard this show 50 years ago. And to be honest, we all broke down. Fortunately, my guest, who was an expert in dealing with people who were going through childhood trauma, kept it together. So she talked about five minutes until we all got it back, because the rest of us our eyes out. So there was some of that, and so there were highlights, but the material was amazing. And then I would say the other thing is, I got to meet some really amazing people. I learned an incredible amount about a wide variety of subject matter, which I think has helped me navigate the personal journey that I'm going through now being a family caregiver, which I'm not sure I could have done otherwise. So that was one of the best things I did my radio show for 12 and a half years. And it was, it was great.

Selma Archer:

Just one more comment on what you just said that childhood trauma. Zach and I recently interviewed a young man who became a caregiver. I believe 11. Zach, he was 11. He was caring for three people, three adults, and he was doing everything for these mostly disabled family members. And he talked about the trauma that 11 year old as a 11 year old, he's like 25 or 23 or something, now in college, but it was just amazing to hear his story and some of the struggles that he still carries with him,

Scott Greenberg:

some of the Zach there's a group down here called AAC y American Association for caregiving youth? I think yes,

Zack Demopoulos:

he was just down there.

Scott Greenberg:

She's kind of a friend of mine, a woman who filed, yeah, she she was one of CNN Heroes. The caregiving youth conversation is an important conversation that gets almost no attention.

Zack Demopoulos:

We'll put a link to that, and we'll put links to your book, to your to your radio show, and also just listeners. Scott's home care is comfort care, C, O, M, F, O, R, C, A, R, E, without the T in it. We'll put those links in there because we know listeners are on the go as they're listening to our show. And speaking of our listeners, I got to tell you, Scott, this is a topic I really want to get into with you, because I have personal experience with this. Our listeners are hoping, banking that they're going to be able to hire home care so they can keep their jobs and keep working. But there's a lot of myths, a lot of nightmares, a lot of horror stories that people share. My first experience with home care wasn't buying a home care agency. It was when I was working at Pfizer, and I called the EAP, and they gave me a list of 13 home care agencies I just called the first one on the top list. They took my credit card, non refundable two weeks of service, and my mother fired them after the second day because they were absolutely rude to her. That was my first experience with home care. So I know a lot has improved since then, but Scott, you have probably a million stories. Let's let me ask you this, what can you educate our listeners on right now about home care to try to minimize some of those fears, or at least make them aware of some of the issues out there?

Scott Greenberg:

So I think I had this conversation with an intake I did this morning before this. All right, so the biggest, you know, let's face it, the generation who needs our services is the generation that says, I don't want any help. I don't need any help. Leave me alone. I can do it myself. Then they migrate into if you make me do this, I'll do it, but I won't make anybody happy. I'm going to do everything I can to sabotage this, but once they get help, they realize, hey, this isn't so bad after all. And then ultimately, it turns into, how did I ever live without this? But here's the thing that must be expressed to the person in need who is in denial and does not want help. Getting help is not the end of your independence. Get Help is the beginning of the restoration of your independence, when you're eating healthier, when your hygiene is improved, when your socialization is real, when you're getting out, when you're going to the store, when you're enjoying life, appreciating life, eating better, doing all of the things that home care allows you to do that you're not doing because you need home care, all right? It enhances the quality of your life. That said, the biggest misconception, or the biggest problem, is, who's going to pay for it? So that's a real issue, right? So you have the two things. Everybody needs it, few can afford it. Problem. So I you know, I don't know if that's a place you want to go, but I think the biggest issue that has, or the biggest conversation I have had over the years, is trying to explain to people who are in denial and refusing care, that everybody they come in contact with gets help from somebody. Their doctor has a nurse. Has somebody who books appointments. They have pharmaceutical sales people. You both come out of pharmaceutical background, right? They have pharmaceutical that help educate the people in the office as to what the best pharmaceuticals might be. The pharmacist has somebody who's taking care of you at the counter, everybody that we do business with or interact with gets help from somebody. Getting help is not bad, all right? And why would you not get help? I can't tell you how many times I wish I had people help me in a host things that I've struggled with, all right? And I think, you know, look, that's why self help books are so prevalent. All right, so I think that is, is the biggest problem, is overcoming the reluctance to get help. The other thing I will say is, people who get help get better quicker. All right, they return to the quality of life quicker. That's why long term care insurance. And I don't sell long term care insurance. I don't have any dog in that hunt, but people with long term care insurance who access help because they're not paying for it, somebody else's typically get better faster and enjoy a better quality of life. You know, the other thing, which you know, again, I'm learning because I'm no kid, right is sometimes we have to acknowledge our own limitations and learn to figure out how enjoy life, given that our circumstances may limit our ability to do some of the things we used to do before.

Zack Demopoulos:

Okay, Scott, can you come up with? I know you can come up with 100 of these, but three like questions that families really should be asking home care agencies. I mean, you mentioned 700 competitors. I guess it's overwhelming shop for home care. But let's say somebody's in front of you, what are three questions that they should be asking you?

Scott Greenberg:

Well, I probably have 20 of them. I think the first thing is the way you frame the question, which is, who should you be interviewing before making a selection? And who you should be interviewing is the person who runs the agency, right the owner of that agency. How committed are they to providing the best quality of care? But beyond that, how do you hire? Who do you hire? You're actually checking their references. What's the problem? Process. What's the background check process? Here in the state of Florida, background checks are mandatory, but they are not as effective as people think they are. There are a lot of surprises in those background checks. So we, for example, do and over and above that. You want to talk about flexibility of schedule. You want to talk about what happens when somebody is not available. Calls off. Remember, caregivers have lives too. They have kids. Kids get sick. Their parents get sick. They have lives. So what happens in that circumstance? Do you answer your phone 24 hours a day, seven days a week? How much time do I need in order to change my schedule? Do you have minimum number of hours, minimum number of days, those are the kinds of the most important thing, I think, though, is, what do caregivers do? What can they do versus what can't they do? So depending upon where you are, what state, that may be different. But here in Florida, there's skilled care and there's non skilled care. There's a lot of confusion in the terminology that accompanies home care. There's home care and there's home health. They are not the same. People think that they are, and so understanding what caregivers can do and what they can't do. So I that was more than three, I know, and I'm sorry, but I could go on.

Zack Demopoulos:

I knew, I knew I'd get you started. Yeah, thank you for those three questions. Great question.

Selma Archer:

Yeah, so Scott in terms of what people can do, what our audience can start to do now, you mentioned Long Term Care Insurance, having that in place. What if there are any other things can people do to get them in a better position to when they inevitably have to sit down with someone like you in the home care business?

Scott Greenberg:

So I think, I mean, that's a great question. So I think again, the whole purpose of my book and my radio show was about giving people the tools to be proactive, as opposed to reactive. So when you're reactive, you tend to make when you make decisions in the moment of crisis. Sometimes they're good, sometimes they're not. Who is the person that's going to help you overcome whatever it is you're trying to overcome. So I believe firmly in having your advanced directives in place. I mean, you need to have a will. I know this sounds common, but you'd be surprised how many people don't who's your healthcare surrogate? Under what circumstances will you call on them? And will they do what you want or what they think they want, right? Do they know what you want? I had a spinal fusion surgery a few years ago, and I did something called pulsed around the country. It could be most it could be pulsed, which is a physician's order for life sustaining treatment. All right? They were operating on my spine. All right, I wrote on that I do not do vegetable well. Translation is, if something happens to me, turn out the lights, pull the plug, I'm done. I don't want to go through that. What is it that you want done? So your Advanced Directives are critical another area, although it's not the same. And I joke about this about, you know, your funeral plans, right? Do you want to be buried on the first floor, the third floor or the fifth floor? Do you want to be side by side? You want to be with your first wife, your second wife or your girlfriend? Right? Do you want your ashes scattered under a tree, out in the sun or on the sea? Who's going to do that? What are the things that you want? The issue is, you can do whatever you want, just make sure somebody knows, right? So that's the next part of my conversation is, is whatever you want to do for all of this, make sure people know, right? When you have kids, kids don't always agree on what mom and dad want, right? That's very important. So if you let them no, there can be no disagreement. So I have a chapter in the book holds mom always loved you more, right? There's a chapter about having to decide, right? Who is going to make the decision? Have people in place who can handle the financial who can handle the health care, who can handle the various component parts of whatever life throws your way, all right, and then who to go to, even in the case of finances, the person I trusted most with my finances just retired last week. All right, so life changes as we continue to live a long time. The people that we were counting on may not be there anymore, may not be able anymore, may not be willing anymore. So it's a matter of having all of the ingredients for what is about to happen. And don't be in denial. It's gonna happen nobody gets out of here alive, right? Let's nobody gets that. So the podcast alive, but nobody's gonna get out of here. So be realistic. Understand, I said at the beginning of the podcast, myself included, okay, who expected my wife to be going through all the challenges that she is going to now, nobody ever saw that coming. And are we prepared? Yes, we're prepared, but we're not 100% prepared, and we have to keep educating ourselves, learning more, talking to experts, and then that is the last thing I'll say on this. Object is, everybody has letters after the name. I have letters after my name. All right, not all those letters mean anything. So if you're going to, if you need to do your advanced directives, you don't go to your neighbor's son who has a great real estate practice in Ohio and you live in North Carolina. All right. You go to an eldercare lawyer who lives in your neighborhood and who understands that. And you get recommendation. You have to go to experts that you trust. You have to interview them. They have to really bring the expertise that they pretend to have, or poor tend to have. You have to make sure that that expertise is real, and get references, get referrals, talk to them, interview them, all right, and make sure that you're comfortable, that they are going to adhere to your wishes, because that's really important.

Zack Demopoulos:

Wow. I'm glad you touched on advanced directors almost every show we touch on it, and I loved your chapter 10 in the book, where you title it, what happens if you don't make it home tonight? I gotta tell you that really hits home. Your listeners, you really have got to check out Scott's book. Oh, my God, I'm getting older, and so is my mom. Scott. You probably, well, you said you had an intake this morning, which, by the way, listeners, that means somebody was calling, probably emotional, to the home care agency because somebody referred them, saying, I need help. My mom or dad are coming home from a hospital, or whatever it might be, I need some help now, I imagine many of those family members that are calling you are working. Can you share a couple of stories, maybe some lessons? What are family members struggling with the most doing their jobs and having to take care of their parents? In your opinion,

Scott Greenberg:

so the average adult child lives 287 miles from their parent, so it doesn't matter how much they love you, it doesn't matter how much they care about you. It doesn't matter how committed they are to you. Getting everything you possibly can from them.

Zack Demopoulos:

Is that the favorite child or the child? Which one is that

Scott Greenberg:

I do a lot of public speaking, and I asked this question, all the time, how many of you have children who live in other states? I'm in Florida, so everybody here. I mean every hand goes up, every hand, how many of you have kids who live in other countries? 20% have family members that live in other countries, typically, all right, so you can't assume that the working child, who may be very close to you can get there. They have to get on a plane, get in the car, make plans for their kids, going off to school. They have lives that don't include taking care of you. So so who is going to do that when as much as they want to be there for you, they can't be so who's the who's going to step in now that may be a care manager, that may be a home care agency. We tell people all the time, sign up with us, even if you don't need us. Sign up with us because we're a licensed state. You have to, I have to go through certain products, but that way, if, if you're on my list and you're already signed up with us, you can call me at 10 and I can have somebody there at 12. You know, I've been on trial right other than I have to get the documents. I had to get a nurse out, right, get there. So I think you have to understand and live in a world of reality. The biggest mistake that I think managers make is they live in the land they think is happening as opposed to the land that is happening. The land that is happening is different than the land we think will happen when the need arises. And what happens if you don't make it home tonight? What percentage of these crises happen at spur of the moment when you least expect it, right? You're stopped at a red light and somebody runs it all right, everything's different as I was writing that chapter, chapter, by the way, Zach, the person who helped me write it, my editor. She was editing that chapter, and her ex husband was on a bike and got hit by a car while she was editing, and so she was helping her kids navigate that, because she still had a relationship with her ex husband, but nobody was prepared for that. So what happens if you that happens, that happens more often than people want to appreciate, right? And so again, proactive, as opposed to reactive, get your village in place. It takes a village. There's a closed circle, which is your kids, your spouse, perhaps your attorney or financial planner. And then there's the greater circle. It does take a village,

Selma Archer:

but what percentage of your clients or family members are still working, still full time employed, and is there anything that you think employers can do to help these individuals?

Scott Greenberg:

So I think look time off when. A crisis hits, is, is, is critical. I'm not as familiar with your space in terms of the EAP plans, but EAP plan isn't just having a policy in place. You have to be actually able to execute on that policy. You have to have resources available. You have to walk the talk, not just walk the walk. You actually have to execute by having resources in place that you can go to when that crisis hits. But I think for me, the key element, I see it all the time, the daughters of the sons simply can't get on a plane take off. They have many obligations, and they need independent, outside services to offer the kind of support, and that support could be any number of things, that could be a doctor, that can be a home care agency, that can be an elder attorney, that can be any number of professionals that are there, but the time to do the homework needs to be reasonable, and the time to put the plan into effect needs to be reasonable. You can't give unlimited time. I understand that. I'm an employer. I get that, but you need to be able to give people the time and the resources to get in place the things needed to move forward, because a family member at any organization who is struggling with outside problems is not as good an employee as a employee who has it all under control, knowing full well that it's under control. And then you have to understand this. I think I mean for for the HR professional, and this is just my opinion. This is not any expert advice. You have to understand. Not everybody's the same. Women and men do handle these situations differently, not all the time, but they handle it differently. The age of the person that your employee matters what their other half of their life, their kids or their parents or their spouse, so there are a lot of ingredients that go into how someone reacts to the crisis that forces them to come ask about the benefits of something like an Employee Assistance Plan. Yeah.

Selma Archer:

Thank you, Zach and I both had the experience well, Zach is still in his long distance care experience, and you've mentioned that a couple times we I didn't have the luxury of ever being in the same state as my mom over the 10 year period that I was her caregiver. So what? What role do you see AI in helping to bridge that distance with that family member who can't be there for all of the situations that occur.

Scott Greenberg:

So in this space, you may not like my answer. I think AI is a technology in search of marketplaces, and I'm not sure yet what role it has in this marketplace, I think in terms of finding resources, yes, perhaps, but I think in terms of finding solutions, I'm not sure yet, because I don't think they're doing a deep enough dive, you know, I would equate it to online shopping versus in store shopping, the number of returns on online shopping vastly exceed the number of returns from in person shopping. And why? Because what you see on the screen isn't necessarily what happens or what it looks like in real life, all right? And I think AI, and I use AI. I've done a lot of research on my wife's conditions, right? Dr, Google is a great resource, until it isn't. I think you have to be careful. I think the next question may be is, where is technology going in home care? There's a difference between high tech and high touch. We use an example of the Jetsons, who's going to provide the kind of soft touch care that George needs when he has Alzheimer's. Is it going to be Judy his wife, or is it going to be Rosie the robot? All right, those metal fingers get awful cold if you have to change his diaper. I think you can't lose sight of the fact that good caregiving can be a combination of high tech and high touch, but nothing is yet here that can replace high touch. 20 years from now, maybe send me a note.

Zack Demopoulos:

Scott, talk to you forever, buddy. We're gonna have to bring you back as we follow the trends on home care. But maybe one last question, I think you were alluding to it earlier and didn't think maybe we should go there, but I do want to go there. Affordability is really important. I'm hoping employers may step up on that at the very minimum, you know, financial, you know, education. I. Um, maybe, you know, providing resources planning, you get caught with your pants down when you become a lot a long distance caregiver, especially the money I spent getting on planes and got to go see my mom and then my dad was That was incredible. What does affordability for home care look like today? And are there some resources that can help out families in that area.

Scott Greenberg:

So it's a tough question, and it could do a whole show just on that subject matter. So look, Medicaid is a federal program, but administered by states. So every state is a little bit different. Everybody thinks you have to be destitute to get on Medicaid. Nothing could be further from the truth, a good elder law attorney can help you do proper Medicaid planning to allow that. However, Medicaid services are not what some people think it should be. I'll be kind. Medicare does not cover home care. Medicare is a restorative health program. It wants you to get better so it can stop paying for you. It is not a long term medical management program. There are some Medicare Advantage plans that will offer you some home care. Typically, it's limited to 80 or 126 hours a year, not a week a year. 80 hours a year doesn't go very far just saying the VA offers some of that in the Affordable Care Act, whether you're a fan or not is immaterial. The Affordable Care Act ignored one area of medical care completely, and that was long term care. Why? Because nobody can afford it. For the first time ever, CMS, Medicare now has a program that will it's called guide, and it's for people with Alzheimer's and dementia that, under certain circumstances, will pay up to$2,500 a year in respite care for a family caregiver. That's the first acknowledgement that there's a need to do this. So you got VA benefits, otherwise you're you got Medicaid, you have long term care insurance. I mean, I'm an advocate for long term care insurance. I used to think I could fund my own long term care until I realized that you can be diagnosed with Parkinson's and have Parkinson's for 25 years. Alzheimer's is a 10 to 15 year journey. Ms, even longer. So the cost of some of the services like assisted living or memory care units can be 10, 1214, $15,000 a month. Doesn't take long to go through an awful lot of money in those regards. So I mean, I would advocate long term care insurance if you're still young enough and able to buy it. I really would, I would and make sure you have an inflation adjusted because costs are going nowhere but up. And I would advocate, you know, saving a lot of money. I would also talk about where you live, right? That four bedroom, two story, two and a half bath home when you're 80 doesn't work quite as well. So think about that at the appropriate time. But it's a challenge. I mean, Zach, you asked the question about affordability, it ain't getting cheaper. I don't know what companies can do, except maybe to offer group long term care insurance, which might be a lot more affordable than getting it on your own might be,

Zack Demopoulos:

yeah, and expanded it beyond maybe the individual and the spouse, maybe help a family member. I guarantee you, most young people that look at that benefit and never click on it, because they have no idea what it even does. So maybe they can do it. Maybe employers, I ask you employers, to kind of step up with that education, those benefits. You know, don't just do it one month a year when you select benefits. Let's promote and educate benefits all year long. Scott, you've been fantastic. So many last quick questions before we let them go.

Selma Archer:

No, just maybe how our audience can get in touch with him, or how they can learn more about the work that you do, access your videos, your book,

Scott Greenberg:

so anybody can call me in my office, 561-630-1620, they can email me. S Greenberg, G, R, E, E, N, B, E R, G at Comfort Care. Calm, for care, C, O, M, F, O, R, C, A, R, E, Zach said it right. Don't put a T in there on that comfort care. That's Greenberg at Comfort Care. Calm, I'm happy to answer anybody's calls. I'm always happy to be a resource. I'm happy to send you a book. I'm happy to do whatever I can to help people navigate to this aging highway that we're on, because it's not an easy journey. It's not but it doesn't have to be hard. There are things you can do to ease the challenges, and there are you can actually see. Control as best you can. You can't handle all the healthcare curves, but you can seize a lot of control if you're proactive and not reactive.

Zack Demopoulos:

That seems to be the theme today. Scott, pro activity. Man, big time. And listen listeners, he he's serious. When he gives out his phone number, he's serious. He will actually give you some time, whether you're in Florida or anywhere in the country, but if you are, especially in South Florida, I hope you'll take them up on that and at least just ask them some questions, anything from the cast today, or anything he is, he's a good guy, really good guy to friend, somebody I'm really proud of called friend. Thank you, Scott, thanks for being here.

Scott Greenberg:

Thanks Zach, thank you so much to meet you. Nice to meet you guys to meet you. So much. Zach, always a pleasure. Always buddy.

Jodi Krangle:

Thank you for tuning in. Be sure to catch new episodes of working caregivers, the invisible employees podcast every other Tuesday. Please also visit our website, invisible employee advocates.com to subscribe to our newsletter, purchase our book and learn more about how we can help you strengthen your workplace to become more supportive of working caregivers you.